Day in the Life of a Japanese Working Mom

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Introduction

This is a glimpse into the daily life of Hifumi, a 27-year-old working mother of two in Tokyo. Balancing her career, household responsibilities, and parenting, Hifumi’s day is a whirlwind of activity, reflecting the realities faced by many working mothers in Japan.

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Morning Routine

Hifumi’s day begins earlier than the rest of her family. While her husband and children—Nana, her 6-year-old daughter, and Hy, her 3-year-old son—are still asleep, she quietly prepares for the day. With little time for herself once the kids are awake, she takes advantage of these early moments to get ready.

Her family lives in a two-story house, having moved there three years ago from Shibuya, one of Tokyo’s busiest areas. They found Shibuya too crowded for raising children and opted for a quieter neighborhood just a few train stations away. In Japan, it’s common to move three to four times in a lifetime, and Hifumi’s family is no exception.

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Breakfast Preparation

Although both Hifumi and her husband work, his longer hours mean she takes on more household responsibilities, including preparing breakfast. Recent studies show that 75.9% of Japanese mothers now work, a significant increase from less than 50% thirty years ago. Hifumi, who wasn’t particularly interested in cooking growing up, learned recipes to make her kids happy. By 7:00 AM, if the kids aren’t awake, she gently wakes them. Mornings can be slow, especially if the children stayed up late the previous night.

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A Weekend Day

On weekdays, Hifumi drops the kids at nursery by 8:30 AM before heading to her job, which continues into the afternoon. On weekends, like today, the pace is slower, but she still balances work and childcare. The kids often watch TikTok or YouTube, a common way for Japanese children to pass the time, and Hifumi welcomes the brief respite this provides.

Hifumi owns a churro business, recently opening her second shop near Yoyogi train station. This adds pressure to her already busy life. After breakfast, she takes the kids to Odaiba, stopping by her shop first to handle a delivery order. Her husband leaves for work, highlighting their shared but uneven household responsibilities.

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Challenges of Parenting

Hifumi is candid about the challenges of raising kids. When exhausted, she can get irritated but tries to stay calm to avoid yelling at her children for the wrong reasons. Her kids are now old enough to play independently, giving her time to tidy up the house. She also navigates moments of sibling rivalry, like when both kids want to be held—a physical impossibility that leaves her feeling guilty when she must prioritize her younger child.

In Japan, laws require children under six to use car seats, which Nana and Hy sometimes resist. Hifumi took several years off work after giving birth, struggling mentally with solo parenting while her husband supported the family financially. The term “one-ope” (one-parent operation) is often used in Japan to describe mothers handling most child-rearing duties. Ultimately, Hifumi returned to work, first in a production job, then starting her own business to gain flexibility for her kids’ activities.

Work and Passion

At her churro shop, Palm Tree, Hifumi arrives early to clean and prepare. She learned her churro recipe from a Michelin-starred chef friend, creating light, crispy churros in various flavors. Her dream is to expand her business across Japan and eventually open a shop in Hawaii, building a better future for her children. Despite early sales challenges, her determination has paid off, and owning her business allows her to manage her schedule more effectively than her previous job.

Family Time and Cultural Nuances

After work, Hifumi takes the kids to Odaiba, one of her favorite places to spend quality time with them. Originally from Fukushima, she values nature and shares this appreciation with her children through outings like this. Lunch at a nearby shopping mall reflects another Japanese parenting norm: researching kid-friendly restaurants in advance. Even high-end restaurants in Tokyo often accommodate families, though not all local spots are suitable for kids.

Japanese table manners emphasize finishing all food to respect farmers and chefs, a value Hifumi instills in her children. After lunch, they visit a dagashiya, a nostalgic penny candy shop recreated in modern malls, where snacks start at just 10 yen (about 8 cents).

Evening Routine

Back home, Hifumi prepares dinner, storing rice in the fridge’s vegetable compartment to maintain its taste, as is common in Japan. Dinner prep is demanding, especially since her picky eaters and health-conscious husband require multiple dishes. Some nights, she’s so busy she eats alone in the kitchen. After dinner, she enjoys a cold beer, a small reward for her tireless day.

Bath time, typically after dinner in Japanese households, happens earlier today due to the beach outing. Hifumi bathes with her kids, a common practice. By 10:00 PM, she puts them to bed, lying with them until they fall asleep—a tradition called soine. This can take time, but it’s a cherished part of Japanese parenting.

Wrapping Up the Day

With the kids asleep, Hifumi finally has time for herself, often using it to work on tasks like designing a new menu for her shop. She may work until midnight or 1:00 AM, a testament to her dedication as both a mother and business owner.

Conclusion

Hifumi’s day reflects the balancing act of being a working mother in Japan. From early mornings to late nights, she juggles family, work, and personal aspirations with resilience and care. Her story highlights the evolving role of Japanese mothers, who increasingly combine careers with parenting, navigating cultural expectations and modern challenges to create a fulfilling life for themselves and their families.

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