Start life from scratch in late 30s | new country, change job

I am in a whirlwind of emotions right now. My life is about to undergo a complete transformation, not only because I’m moving to a new country, but also because I’m changing careers. The past few days have been filled with a mixture of excitement and uncertainty. It feels surreal that in just a few days, everything will be different. As I reflect on this moment, I’m reminded of a book I read last year, The Almanack of Naval Ravikant. One of the things that really resonated with me was his emphasis on three major life decisions: where you live, who you spend your life with, and what you do. Most people talk about the latter two, but I want to focus on the first — where you live.

I’ve lived in three different countries so far: I spent my childhood in Thailand, moved to the U.S. for a year when I was 18 as a foreign exchange student, and then to the UK in my early thirties. From my experience, I can confidently say that where you live shapes how you view the world and approach life. Your environment can either fuel or stifle your growth. While I love the UK, I’ve felt too comfortable here for a long time. Comfort turned into complacency, and I realized that my current environment wasn’t enabling me to become the best version of myself. This was one of the main reasons I started my reinvention journey—to push myself out of this comfort zone. My decision to move isn’t solely about changing countries but about seeking an environment that aligns with my goals and ambitions.

After much contemplation, we’ve decided to move to the U.S. temporarily for the next five years. The process started last year when we applied for our visas, and it’s been a long wait filled with uncertainty and doubt. Letting go of the life we’ve built here hasn’t been easy. As I pack up our things, I’m struck by how much we’ve accumulated over the years — things we probably don’t even need. This whole process has made me realize the importance of distinguishing between wants and needs, a skill that’s essential in life.

Reflecting on my past experiences, particularly my attempts to stay in the U.S. after my exchange year, I realize how unpredictable life can be. Back then, I couldn’t afford to stay, and later, in 2009, I tried again but couldn’t secure a sponsorship job. If you had told me back then that I’d one day receive a five-year visa and have a new career waiting for me in the U.S., I would’ve thought it impossible. Life has a funny way of redirecting us. What may seem like failure at one point could be the universe guiding us toward something better. I truly believe that as long as you keep taking consistent action toward your goals, there’s no such thing as failure — just a matter of time.

As our house empties out, reality starts to sink in. This is happening, and there’s no turning back. I can feel fear coursing through me — fear of judgment, fear of failure. After all, not only am I moving countries, but I’m also changing careers at 38, an age when many people expect you to be settled. But what does it mean to be settled, really? If being settled means finding someone to share life’s journey with, building wealth together, and supporting each other, then I’m all in. But if it means staying in the same place, stuck in autopilot, and never questioning whether you’re living to your full potential, then I’m not interested.

In times of fear, I remind myself of a quote that has always guided me: “Be afraid and do it anyway.” I’ve lived by this mantra for years, even getting it tattooed on my back. Every time I’ve faced uncertainty or resistance, I’ve pushed through, and I’ve always come out stronger on the other side. I’m hoping this time will be no different. Today is our last day in this house, and I’m filled with mixed emotions. I know exciting things are waiting for me on the other side of this change, and though it’s hard to say goodbye, I feel ready for whatever comes next.

As I stand here, surrounded by the remnants of our life in this house, I can’t help but feel the weight of all the memories we’ve made here. It’s strange how physical spaces hold so much emotional energy — every corner, every room, carries a piece of our story. This is the place where we laughed, cried, grew, and evolved. And now, as I prepare to step into a new chapter, I find myself grappling with both excitement and sadness.

The idea of starting over in a new country feels daunting. There’s an undeniable fear of the unknown—new routines, new people, a new culture to adapt to. Yet, underneath that fear, there’s also a deep sense of possibility. The thought of reinventing myself in this next phase of life is exhilarating. I’ve always believed that change is essential for growth, and this move feels like the ultimate opportunity to challenge myself in ways I never have before. It’s a chance to redefine what I want from life, not just in terms of my career but also in how I want to live, who I want to be, and what kind of impact I want to make in the world.

One thing that keeps running through my mind is how, at this stage in life, people tend to expect stability. Society has this notion that by the time you’re in your late 30s, you should have everything figured out — a steady career, a settled home, perhaps even a family. But I’ve come to realize that “settled” means something different to everyone. For me, being settled doesn’t mean staying in one place or following a conventional path. It means finding a sense of inner peace and fulfillment, no matter where I am or what I’m doing. It’s about constantly growing, evolving, and pushing the boundaries of what I think is possible.

As I reflect on my journey, I can see that every experience—even the ones that felt like failures at the time—has led me to this point. Every step, every setback, was necessary for my growth. There were times I thought I had failed, but looking back, I realize that those moments were simply redirections, nudging me toward something greater. It’s a reminder that life doesn’t always unfold the way we expect, but that doesn’t mean it’s not leading us to where we need to be.

With the house now almost empty, the reality of leaving hits harder. I’ve been holding back tears all day, but now, as I stand in the quiet, I can’t help but feel a wave of emotion wash over me. It’s not just sadness; it’s a mix of nostalgia, fear, excitement, and hope. There’s something incredibly bittersweet about closing one chapter to begin another. I know this move is right for us, and I trust that the journey ahead will be filled with growth and new opportunities. But at this moment, it’s hard to say goodbye to the life we’ve known for so long.

I remind myself once again of that quote that has been my guiding light: “Be afraid and do it anyway.” Fear is a natural part of any big change, but I’ve learned that it’s not something to run from. If anything, it’s a sign that you’re about to do something transformative. I’ve faced fear before, and each time, it’s brought me to a place of greater strength and understanding. I’m hoping this time will be no different. I know there will be challenges ahead, but I’m ready to face them with courage and an open heart.

This is it. The last day in this house, the last moments in this chapter of my life. As I take one final look around, I feel a sense of closure, but also a deep anticipation for what lies ahead. Change is never easy, but it’s necessary if we want to grow and reach our full potential. So, with a mix of tears and a hopeful heart, I’m ready to step into the unknown and embrace whatever comes next.

As I take that last look around the house, I realize how much this space has been a part of me. Every crack in the walls, every piece of furniture, every nook and cranny—they all hold pieces of my life, my growth, my journey. It’s almost like saying goodbye to an old friend who’s been there through thick and thin. This home has been a sanctuary, a place where I’ve experienced love, laughter, setbacks, and triumphs. And now, as I prepare to leave, there’s an overwhelming sense of gratitude for all that it has given me.

But life, as I’ve come to understand it, is about moving forward. The hardest part of change is often the letting go — not just of physical places or things, but of the versions of ourselves we leave behind. This move signifies more than just relocating to another country; it marks the end of a chapter where I have been one version of myself, and the beginning of a new chapter where I get to redefine who I am, what I want, and how I show up in the world. There’s something incredibly freeing about that — the idea that I don’t have to stay confined by the person I’ve always been.

As I move to the U.S., I’m not just seeking new opportunities or a career shift; I’m seeking reinvention. I want to shed the layers of comfort and complacency that have kept me rooted in the same patterns for too long. I want to challenge myself in ways I never have before, to push beyond the boundaries of what I think I’m capable of. And while that thought excites me, it also terrifies me. But I’m learning that fear is not a signal to stop—it’s a signal to keep going.

When I look back on the past, I realize that the moments when I’ve felt the most fear have often been the moments that led to the most significant growth. Every time I’ve stepped into the unknown, I’ve come out stronger, more resilient, and more aligned with who I’m meant to be. It’s not always easy to see that in the moment, but in hindsight, it all makes sense. This move feels like one of those moments. The fear is real, but so is the potential for transformation.

As we finalize the packing and prepare to leave, I can’t help but think about all the new experiences that await. New beginnings come with a clean slate—a chance to build something entirely fresh. I’m excited to explore new landscapes, meet new people, and immerse myself in a new culture. But beyond the external changes, I’m most excited about the internal journey that this move will spark. I want to continue growing, evolving, and pushing myself toward new heights. There’s a deep sense within me that this change, as frightening as it may be, is exactly what I need to step into the next phase of my life.

I’ve always believed that we have the power to create the life we want. It’s not always easy, and sometimes it requires making bold, uncomfortable choices. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that staying in your comfort zone doesn’t lead to growth. Comfort can be tempting, but it can also be stifling. It’s only by stepping outside of that comfort, by embracing the uncertainty and the fear, that we can truly discover what we’re capable of.

As we close the door to this house for the last time, I’m filled with a sense of closure but also a renewed sense of purpose. This move, this reinvention, isn’t just about finding a new home in a new country—it’s about finding a new home within myself. It’s about aligning with my true desires, my true passions, and my true purpose. It’s about becoming the person I know I’m meant to be.

With a deep breath and a heart full of mixed emotions, I step forward into the unknown. There’s a world of possibility waiting on the other side of this move, and while I don’t know exactly what’s ahead, I trust that it will be everything I need it to be. This is the beginning of something new, something transformative, something that will shape the next chapter of my life in ways I can’t yet imagine. And as I take this leap, I’m reminded once again—be afraid and do it anyway. That’s the mantra I’m carrying with me as I embark on this next adventure.